Tag: clarity

The endless journey between I & WE.

~ PA ~ Leave a comment

The story of our lives, each one of us, is nothing more then the endless trials, errors, success and failures that each one of us sets ourselves up either at individual levels or at a level of being part of some team.Join me here as we explore this space and try to understand what is the real essence of being in the “I” or the “WE” and when should we be where and what happens when that works for us or against us! So here we go!

When we are kids and going through our school lives- in the very early stages, even as we are still trying to make sense of what and who we are, we are told about the value of being assertive and being vocal and visible in different ways time and again! As you grow a little wiser and learn to flex and stretch you ability to self-assert through ways which are allowed and not, you soon start to get a dose on the relevance and value of “social care”, and how the “WE” is greater and stronger than the “I” kind of a parable and well sure enough, falling prey to the social conformation bias with the remining innocence that one may have- pretty soon you start to say “ok” to adjust play second or third or no fiddle at all simply to conform to the idea and belief that “WE” is more important than the “I”!

If you thought this piece of crap of being compelled to choose and adopt to either the “I” or the “WE” ends with your education, well sadly it doesn’t! The extent and the intensity with which the constant coercion continues goes on to permanently damage every bit of “I” and every attribute of the quality of collaboration that can be extended into the “WE”! even as people step into the corporate world to serve a business or step into the social arena to serve humanity! We actually end up in a world where damaged Individuals collaborate to collectively screw up the world further together and with time the world goes into that bit deeper rut and keeps getting nudged into spaces of being beyond repair in different areas at different times! This is not because there is a flaw with the “I” or the “WE” approach, the manifestations of all humankind problems are because the inability to know when is the time to allow the “I” and when to allow the “WE” to take charge!

At one stage of life you are told that “I” matters and soon enough you are told that “WE” matters, well the real thing is that both of these matter in the context of what the purpose is and what is at stake! There is no way of looking at life with an approach of either “I” or “WE”, it has to always be a blended approach of being “I” and “WE” in response to what stands in front of you to challenge and what is that you are supposed to create or offer to the world and the social context around you! Let me explain! As you embark to pursue your career in the initial days and years, sure enough you would be appreciated or reprimanded based on your performance more than the team;s performance, this is the space where your “I” approach is being evaluated and improved or rather you are made to improve so that business goals are met. Something similar to your primary schooling! As you grow and mature in the chosen job or vocation, soon enough, if your “I” has been empowering and meaningful, you will be given the responsibility to lead a few and soon enough you begin to get answerable not only for your standalone “I” but also for the collective “WE” that you represent and are accountable for! Unless you have understood and mastered your “I” you will fail and falter with the “WE” each and every time!

When it comes to the larger play of society- perhaps representing a community/society or a nation, the power of “WE” and the promise of “WE” over-rides whatever your “I” may be! The corporate world is pretty calibrated and metric driven, your “I” will only be given so many chances and as soon as you begin to falter and fail even the “WE” camouflage will not be able to rescue you from the eminent ejection- this is the space where CXOs begin to get fired and asked to leave! When it comes to the world where public support is garnered through competing narratives and promises and stories of hope, unless the people and sensitive elements do not see value in the collective “WE” they will not rally behind you, no matter how iconic the story of your “I” is and this is the real truth- the trial by fire when it comes to wanting to be a public figure- the constant scrutiny and evaluation is often too much then one can handle and with time those who can’t often fade away form public memory and the glitz simple because the “WE” did not accept or need the “I” or the “I” has already served it’s purpose and will be ejected like an idea whose time is bygone!

People often spend their whole life, trying to adjust their “I” to the “WE” and vice versa , not realizing ever that the real trick is to allow both of them to be there and evolve with the dynamism of the contexts around! The greatest fallacy is perhaps the idea to exchange or trade away your “I” for the “WE” or the other way around, simply because you need both of them at different times on an ongoing basis and the audience for both of them are almost always different and you then have a choice to choose which audience is more meaningful and valuable to you over the other and for what frame of time! It is only when you are able to apply this principle that you will find it easy to be self-asserting and open to ideas and wanting to lead others’ ideas with as much as ease as those of your own!

The real essence of life is about finding a progressive equilibrium with regards to applying the “I and the “WE” and knowing when to deploy which of these and for how long! History is replete with examples when Individuals have been iconic and when they have failed miserably, likewise there are examples of achieving greatness through group-think and precipitating disasters through it! The only real way to go about is to embrace the “I” and the “WE” at the right time to the right extent and ensuring you allow both of them to develop and thrive as the dynamic times around us constantly demand a new version and potent “I” and “WE” with every new sunrise!

I leave you here with these thoughts, urging you to take a pause and reflect what is that you have been deploying more? The “I” or the “WE” and what has worked and what has not!

Ciao for now, will be back soon with another one! Until then stay in the now and use what you must, your “I” and “WE” are as unique as who you are!

Harness the Invisible to stay Invincible.

~ PA ~ Leave a comment

As trivial as it may seem, in the times that we are in today, that cloak of invisibility is what alone can provide us with invincibility as we navigate through our lives pursuing our aspirations and connecting the dots and dashes! Join me here for a quick read through to learn about what this invisibility is all about and how that has the ability to empower us to a point of being invincible, why is it so elusive and what is that we can really do about it! So here we go!

Whether you are running for the Presidency of a nation or wanting to get that next big break or simply want to put on your 100% at what you have on your hand, it all begins with your ability to decode the invisible forces around and within you and harness them to make you invincible to attain what you are pursuing.

Often people end up being entrapped in all that is played around them and more importantly within the visible spectrum – of what they see or rather should I say more appropriately what they perceive to see! Even as they go about this, they completely forget to factor in the vital aspect of what exists behind what is apparently being played out and this critical component is often what gives strength and power to what manifests around us! Unless we are able to decipher these drivers which almost always remain hidden away form plain sight and what gets played around to the audience, we will always end up being short changed as far as being able to get to the reality and truth of what is there and what is being told is there! Let me explain!

Consider the ongoing crisis developing form the US Elections, what we get to see around is- whether you have loyalties to aligned to the Red or the Blue- irrespective of that- the fact remains that- in the ensuing war for the coveted chair- a lot of ugliness is now coming to the forefront and the way that is coming through is likely to end up doing more damage to the nation and rather than building it further- like every election is supposed to be actually doing, these have actually ended up making the nation more vulnerable and divided more than ever! But hidden away, far away from what media projects, analyzes and sells as stories to the dutiful unsuspecting viewer, are the real stories of how at this very moment politicians, bureaucrats, the judicial system and the uniforms that are under oath to serve and protect the nation would be working overtime and really fast to derive meaningfulness and sense from the chaos around to help the nation arrive at a sane decision which is just, fair, transparent and which holds the promise for the people of the nation for the now and the years ahead! Think around this, tucked away from all what happens in front of the cameras exists a whole world- a complete different eco-system which is all aligned to one cause- the cause of the nation- irrespective of the political ideology and it is this system that will eventually come up with the answers that the whole world awaits for!

If this is true about the political system, so it is for everything around us, whether it is the sales deal that you want to clinch or that decision that you want to implement for the organization that you lead- all of that will only work and work as it should only if you have deciphered who the invisible forces are and what is that they aspire for! Unless and until you don’t have a buy in or a nod so to say from those quarters, no matter what you do, and how well you do, what you do- success will remain as elusive and as certain as your ever growing confusion- as you fail to comprehend the reality around from the lens of the invisible forces! But what could be these invisible forces that control outcomes for Individuals? Well read on!

These seemingly invisible forces are your belief systems, your approach, your attribute, your competences, ability to discern and apart from these intrinsic aspects, you have the every changing extrinsic variables around you that have the power to impact what you aspire for and what you intend to do- the action that you are ready to take to get what you aspire! These could be the social construct (the passive ones’ which are so easy for one to overlook), the timing (of what you want to do- whether others are ready for that!), the intent (whether the larger intent of the society is aligned to you or not!) and finally the ever present great question “what is there in it for me?” and to make matters more intriguing this question can pop up n number of times from the same space or from new pockets and this ever changing flux is what goes on to alter the course of an individuals ability to hold on to success or experience a “yo-yo” effect on their success quotient as the extrinsic factors play havoc and try to scuttle the stability associated with their pursuit of success! So what’s the story? What’s the point here?

Well, the point is plain and simple; as gullible and deceptively simple it is to get sold into all that gets played around you all the time, that very attribute of the society or the individual ends up setting them up against the Invisible forces operating upon them and dragging them into an eternal battle zone where there is no winner and no looser! This is what ends up depleting a majority of individuals and societies; as they play to what is seen and what is perceived they neglect and disregard the value and the power of the Invisible forces and that is all that is required to embrace limiting success or continuing failure! It is only when individuals or societies are able to rise above and beyond the narratives that they are been served with and able to see the operating Invisible forces behind them, that they will be able to better manage and control the outcomes aligned to their aspirations, simply by deciphering the Invisible better and using that very force to augment and multiply their efforts to empower them for being resilient and strong as they keep walking on the path of their aspirations!

It is only this space of knowing what can provide you invincibility that will ever empower you and keep you on the trajectory of being successful by harnessing thee Invisible powers that are always at work- it’s just about getting them to work for you and not working against them!

I leave you with these thoughts here, take a break and seek the invisible powers around you and do reflect upon whether they offer or take away that vital Invincibility form you!

Ciao for now, will be back soon with another one! Until then stay Invincible and harness the invisible!

Don’t stress(for nothing!).

~ PA ~ Leave a comment

This is not a pep talk article, about trying to give you ten tips to wish away your stress, rather this is about trying to simplify what stress really is, rather than what is ts thought to be and possibly explore what can we do about it, if we can really do something about it! So join me here and let’s simplify the formless shadow of stress!

Have you ever had the privilege of being part of a group of kids discussing their challenges? yes kids- those 3-4-5-6 year old who discuss amongst themselves and figure their way around either by themselves or with help from their buddies! Have you ever seen them talk to each other using words like “stress”? Consider this, you have this bunch of kids who are given a new jig-saw puzzle to fix, with no context and no background- what happens- well kids being kids- they will try for sometime, eventually as it makes no sense and if there’s no reward for what they are doing, they will simply put those jig-saw blocks to some other creative use and that’s where that will end! None of those kids are going to bed sulking and thinking about what that was, why it could not be done and so on and so forth! But these very kids, as they start to grow, they come under the influence of directed thinking (you see directed thinking is not about helping them think- it is about making kids thinking in a particular way that suits the broader social fabric of a society) and this is where the problems begin to manifest!

Humanity has always been lead and rewarded by curiosity and that innate value gets wiped off as modern day societies start to enforce directed thinking principles which conform to social biases and standards and don’t allow any kind of eccentric attributes, sure enough the ones’ that pose a threat to the social fabric should be curbed and managed, but with that approach we also end up loosing all hope of developing geniuses around us!– If you ever thought that great geniuses of any field were not eccentric- well it’s time you picked up and read one of those biographies to know the facts! The essence there was that their curiosity and eccentricity to a specific pursuit was always upheld and encouraged and that what led to innovation and discovery, which has gone a long way to share who we are today- as Individuals and collectively as societies the world over!

Once kids are programmed to think the way society wants, these kids loose all resilience that childhood would have naturally given to them. As they grow up they keep getting pushed from one scenarios of “what you must do and not” to the next and that shit also continues even as they begin to work and keep moving up the corporate world as they keep getting successful! You may be wondering how come they keep getting successful if they lack curiosity and ingenuity- well you see 95% of corporate world is all about directed work- the Big Boss shares the big plan and we have an army of all other smaller bosses and laborers working on that- while each one of them thinking that it is their thought!- If there was ever a personification of a hypnotized work force- that is the era that we are living in! This is why , when you see how things get played around, they rise and fall every time “The Big Boss” gets it right or screws up! So where is the stress coming in all of this?

Well the invisible stress is always there, as the born intelligent kids get to high schools and colleges, where they are again and again battered down to stop being creative and think the way they are ought to and furthermore as they land “The job” of their dreams they are further indoctrinated through the fabled ” corporate induction” which is nothing more than a kinder way of saying, “This is what we do, This is the way we do it, Either take it or leave it”! So, when does this stress begin to show up? Well it shows up every now and then when life throws questions in your face, where you don’t have templated responses- like the times when you are asked to go ahead with your first surgery , or that first assault if you are a cop, or that first fire rescue, the first time you asked someone out for date! See, stress starts to build and this stress is not building because you aren’t able or you are incompetent, but this stress builds up because for the first time you are in direct conflict between the way you have been hammered down to think and how you naturally think and feel about the reality that is staring right down back to you! In that moment of truth- you are evaluating your choices of being safe, alive and making it back in one piece with a result that works in your favour or in the favour of greater good! Since this is something that no business school or practise teaches- stress creeps in and this is how it starts to play havoc with you, each time from your first time! Whenever you come to the cross road where you don’t have a templated solution- you will start to feel that stress race up to you- not because you are dumb or can’t handle a situation developing in front- but the years of “programmed thinking” has been made your default thinking style to seek answers from around and not within and unless you don’t switch back your default to within- like you always did when you were a kid- stress is going to get the better of you- it doesn’t matter whether you make a few hundred dollars or a few millions dollars, unless you don’t begin to think and feel from within and learn to junk away programmed and directed thinking escaping stress is going to remain a very tough thing to do! So how doe we go about it?

Stress is not the absence of competence, rather it is the presence of it and importantly the inability to be able to deploy it- in the contextual settings that an individual finds themselves in! Each one of us are magicians in or own way- we are gifted at something to ensure that a task assigned to us, gets done the natural way which comes to us easily- unfortunately that is not how the real world works- from the call centre to the White House press briefing everything is scripted- some for the right reason and few others for the most stupid reasons! Consider this, how simple it would be to empower people to greet and speak to customers who call in the natural way which allows people to spread their personality and warmth as they speak- rather make them narrate the script written- the way it has been- even as the callers and the narrator have no clue what that is and than you have the timer to mark you off that call, simply because you were too slow or fast- I mean who really works that way! It is instances like this and many more- that go on to add stress to the people at all ends of that kind of a scripted approach- which does nothing more than taking away form our true strengths and puts us in a territory where we are completely disadvantaged and we are supposed to switch our thinking to a lower level of “do this and than that and do it this way” kind of a lever!

Given, this is a blog, will share a few final words before we wrap this piece up, stress is not about your competence, abilities and who you are, stress is nothing more or less than your inability to cope with the ways of directed thinking- the more creative you are as person- the chances are that you will always tend to experience higher levels of stress no matter what vocation you choose to pursue! Some areas of work do have in built stress associated with the kind of work- but people are trained about that- again not through directed thinking but rather by providing clarity and support to do away with that space- I am sure you don’t want to be in an ER where the Doctor is sweating more than you and wondering what to do next! The unwanted stress that gets added up to you, only robs you away of whatever creativity, ingenuity and intrinsic genius that you have and tries to align you to be normal as defined by the compulsions of your work place or society!

The only way and the real way to deal with stress, as I see it, is to be connected within and lead yourself as you always did when you were a kid- through curiosity, persistence and intellect- as long as you continue to do this, you will be able to sieve through everything around you with amazing clarity and immediately know when its time to act, which way and when it’s time to exit a place- simply because it threatens to steal the gifts within you and try to make your extraordinary story an ordinary one!

Well, think about it and trust me, don’t get stressed for nothing! You see when you have a situation, the realities are only two- Either you can do something about it or you can’t- this irrespective of whether they impact you or not. So when you can make a change- Lead yourself and get that done by being who you are- there is no social template for that! and when you can’t do anything, use all your gifts to ensure that you are able to stand the storm and emerge on the other side with as little as collateral damage as possible! Stress really makes no sense and has no place- junk directed thinking, social biases, read through the agendas and keep yourself intact and stress free!

Ciao for now, will be back soon with another one! Until then relax and be yourself! Always!