The isolation advantage!

Well, in the context of what’s happening around the world, for now, “isolation”, may be the only word that is so respected  and feared at the same time! So even as nations battle it out there using all the tricks that they have in their book- one common thread on all this happens to be “keeping distance” and “isolation” as much as possible- well certainly that’s the way and perhaps the only way to fight contagious diseases from spreading (we learnt this as students of grade four, I guess), until we have the vaccines in place. But still what’s important to observe and study is how the human mind is coping up with or loosing it, as social interactions are restricted and at times when Isolation becomes the norm! This is about knowing how amazingly we the see the best and hope even in the darkest and most trying times! So here we go!

We all know about humans being “social animals” and have learned this at school (and even if we have not been to any), through the mere fact that we are related and would have a dozen of first cousins and over two dozens of second level relations, merely reflects how human society has evolved through the last three centuries! As the promise of resources (read food, water, shelter and safety) grew over the last three centuries, humans have resigned themselves to the comfort of community support for all situations good and bad– whether it is a community fun fare, marriages in the little town tucked away far from the city, political representation (unless you are yet being ruled by kings/ autocrats) or it is about saving lives in face of natural calamities and being there for one another when disaster strikes! This is more or less how we have always been and this is how it is supposed to be – irrespective of all the differences of ideologies and pressures acquired by a society by virtue of the urge to control and dictate- this fundamental thread of being able to look out for one another for good and bad and expecting nothing in return ( and you always thought only animals are wired like this!).It has always been so and it is again, we humans who have from time to time either ignored this or played even this to our advantages!

Looping back to the times that we are experiencing right now, the induced isolation, through self-quarantines and medical quarantine worldwide to protect ourselves and the ones around is throwing up some strange strategies to cope with this new dictate of the ruling governments! There are some communities which even under lock-down situations have managed to connect through human voice and music (even as they stay isolated), there are yet who have possibly sought refuge to engage and interact online, so that they feel and stay connected, yet others roam about as if nothing happened ( and these are the gifted ones’ who have always remained in self- imposed quarantine either because of their lengthened intelligence or completely extinguished cognitive ability- either ways it’s helping the world for now! More strange have been those instances where few- really handful few- who have mustered the courage to escape and run away form quarantined zones! So what are all these behavioral attributes saying about us and the human mind! What are we now evolving into as we face and overcome this global menace which is requiring us to manage social distance and be unto ourselves- how will this help or harm the future of our societies?

Human brain seeks companionship and that’s how it is hard-wired – you may be the most eclectic of yogi’s or saint’s seeking divine bliss- but even for you to tell the world that you have attained it- you will still need someone to speak to about it! So when you put people in completely unnatural situations- the first involuntary reaction is of disbelief- “No this can’t be happening- not to me- the medical guys have made a mistake- they are idiots- It can’t be”, this is followed by a quick realization of the next point- “well what if they are right and I am not taken care of – I may not exist and I may be well on my way out of the planet and the end up being a statistical number!- This powerful thought then overcomes the initial disbelief and shock making co-operation possible and then resigning oneself to the orders from perfect strangers who call themselves whoever they are-doctors, paramedics, you name it – The simple promise that you will be fine and safe by doing what we say- is such a powerful statement that almost 99% people will comply and pay heed to what these strangers are saying(In different context of history though- read dictators- it is exactly a similar response that has ended up having more people killed then cured!).The remaining 1%, well yes they do exit and these are the one’s who will end up doing eccentric stuff- running away, not following rules, not taking medicines, playing dumb- intentionally and unintentionally- they do this not because they want to – but simply the situation has become so overwhelming to their minds that they no longer can cope with it and hence neither have a trusting bias or a doubting bias (if you have one of these biases you can be managed and cured by developing an alternative narrative- but when you keep switching fast between the narratives- you end up becoming a living nightmare for the world – far worse then the battles against a virus! So what’s the way ahead and how do we make most of a situation which gets labelled as “Isolation”

One way, is to change the narrative from the word itself-instead of calling it Isolation- Call it “Time for personal investment”- a time to invest into yourself – to develop your personal strengths, learn to do away with your fears (demons in your head) and your weaknesses, a time to pursue something your daily routine and rush of life kept you away from (as long as it can be pursued within the confines of being isolated- I am not suggesting someone to pick up a guitar and arrange for live concert- rather pick it up and upload a video online!). This “Me time” can be used to assess your priorities in light of the new vulnerabilities that the world is bring to you- maybe you need to move to a new place- maybe you need to reassess the job you do – maybe you need to learn how to be strong and focused by yourself to keep you safe and maybe its time for you to realize that “Life cant and should not be taken for granted”! Once we flip our view of isolation and start to fill it with the books we needed to read, the films that we wanted to watch, the chats that we wanted to have with our friends, the peace that we would have wanted to hold within or as simple as the afternoon nap that you wanted to have in so many years- just seek what was amiss from your busy life and let this curse of isolation be turned into a blessing in disguise and use it to your advantage so that we the crisis is finally over and you emerge- you emerge as a person changed for good – who now values each moment of life in a more meaningful and mindful way- and possibly by then you know what wise issues you should engage with and when you should walk way from what doesn’t make you feel enriched and a better person!

I leave you with these thoughts on a Monday, wherever you are reading this, no matter how isolated you are, now you know how to make isolation work for you! Remember it is not the Isolation that hurts, it is the fear of missed opportunities and lack of connect that troubles us- because we tend to have a fear of missing out the social beacons (which we normally  use as our glide path as we navigate around society!). Once you have reached deep within yourself and re-assessed your priorities- thanks to the available time through isolation- you will no longer be in search of beacons and will most probably end up being a light house for others in the society to follow!

Ciao for now, grab that drink and stay wise! Run wild  with your thoughts and imagination and pursue your dreams- for this is the time to build upon your strengths, dreams and ideas and these will come alive eventually as you sustain and their time arrives!

 

When Capitalism turns fatal!

To begin with, I am not an anti-capitalist, certainly not until it is used in a good and wise measure; something like salt is used for seasoning our food! Of course yes, you know what happens when we have excess of salt in our food, don’t you! For that matter excesses of anything aren’t really good most of the times! This piece is to help us take a pause and ponder if we have actually breached that tipping point and gone past a point of no return wherein- societal compulsions are driving societies towards the edge of a cliff form where no one gets back!

Let’s step back into the last three centuries; the beginning of the 1700s is where we start; As rapid advancements and breakthroughs occurred in science and technology around the new world (Europe and US), coupled with ample resources at disposal- it was a few good people who took an initiative to lead and channelize this massive energy of human ingenuity through setting up large factories and these bygone temples of modernization – on whose foundation the world of today stands! It is the story of these geniuses and their tenacity to create a better world in terms of amenities/ products/ innovations and ease of living for everyone around with a focus to make things affordable as much as possible in the earlier flourish that brought about a promise of good times for the subsequent decades. Certainly there were spikes here and there; accidents, mishaps, health emergencies, natural calamities- all of that was there;however society prevailed and overcame each time with more resilience and grit to ensure that past mistakes aren’t repeated and the the focus on the future is not lost!

As long as these doyens of yesteryear’s, kept the focus on churning out gadgets, products that served society and at the same time uplifted the standard of living of all stake holders in a manner that was equatable to the contribution made- everything seemed fine and the new world was on a roll. Even incidents like World War I and II did only dampen the momentum for a decade or so around the war times- but soon systems bounced back and kicked in with greater vigor to wash away the additional negative burden that the wars caused with bring in more creativity and innovation to make lives even more better! So what changed at the beginning of the 21st century, where did we go wrong?

Things started to slide when ingenuity, larger interest to serve the communities lessened and was replaced by a personal greed race coupled with the insatiable ability to manipulate political power and policy. This I believe is the foundation on which all modern day corporate malice is based upon! I don’t want to sound judgmental here and leave it to readers wisdom and discretion to decide when an act of greed was OK and when it was Not OK- but the point here is quite simple- every time when you have a blend of business power tagging along and manipulating the political power through impacting policy in the interests of the business owner rather then in the interest of the community or society- the ancient equilibrium is broken and this imbalance starts to manifest all around us in one way or the other and things then head for time bound decay!

Let me simplify this for you, remember that old steel plant in your neighborhood that came up, how it provided everything from a school, to a medics to an entertainment centre- shopping arena and life was good in general. Then one day you start learning- about new machines which can perform more then what the workers could and over the next few years you learn how- there is a new steel manufacturer somewhere else who has been able to offer better quality and price to the government and how this plant can no longer compete and has to either be sold off to this competitor or has to go bust! Well when you read in between the lines- it is something that is happening right in front of you- within your blind spot – that you have missed picking up! If the business did make money- how much did they invest back into the society- how often and in what proportion to the gains made! Well, certainly I am not suggesting a structure where all profits must be given back into the society- but the keyword here is equatable sharing of the profit- in line with the effort table- when this goes amiss- something is wrong and that thing- can be anything- ranging from tough political alignments of the owner to just a sudden collapse of being able to manage a business that had started off as a family owned set up which just outgrew and simply couldn’t be managed anymore!

In the modern day context, we have ample examples- just take a pause and look around- you will find these mushrooming companies that get launched day in and day out- seldom most of them make it beyond the third year andif they do by the time they enter the fifth year- they are bought out- either by choice or by tact- so what’s happening- who is controlling- well get a little closer- earlier when jobs were created- the jobs had meaning – well a welder was a welder and a Shop floor Supervisor was a “Shop floor Supervisor”- now in a era where everyone is a MBA and everyone is a Manager- guess what there is hardly anyone or anything to manage- most of the jobs are typically clerical and routine cloaked in the garb of business designations and labels that do nothing more then giving a steroidal boost to your ever hungry ego- so when the going gets tough for the business (read discord between big players/ politicians/ bankers/ investors- gain read here global market manipulators) your business card doesn’t stand a chance- for the simple reason- that actually you were not doing anything! A simple test that I often ask my clients when I coach them (especially when they are all fired up about their visiting card- “Is what you do unique to who you ate- or can that be done by anyone having an equal qualification and or experience?” if you have answered “Yes” well it’s time you get priorities of your life realigned for the next set of lottery tickets which help people move out may well have your name on it!

So what’s the point here- Well the point is simple and there for you to observe and experience- Once capitalism and businesses begin to sub-serve their stakeholders in context of the efforts put in by stakeholders; this is the first signal that greed has overtaken and based on where this hoarded profit is been pushed (whether to placate the political systems or to hoard family wealth) the systemic collapse will start to take effect eventually from thereon! So what can you and I do about it? – Well nothing- not unless we have the power and authority tom ensure rules and regulations are made to manage this loophole– until then the only sensible thing we can do is Be Honest- with yourself- Know your real worth- in terms of the money that you make- the designation that you have and the unity of command and span of control that your enjoy! It is never too late to say NO to an offer which provides you a designation which does not make sense and offers you money that doesn’t justify your effort! It starts from this point and when empowered and awakened individuals rise with they can propagate these values which can also help repair systems from within!

I leave you here, grab your drink and take a pause- know where you stand on this horizon where businesses and the world meet and impact your next sunrise!

Wasted lives and the quest for immortality-the story of our times!

Yes, a completely different and refreshing take on what drives us, binds us and at the end of all blinds us to believe what we normally do and how these beliefs help and destroy us even as we strive to shape our lives in a quest to stay alive forever (read immortality) and end up doing more often then not what we are not designed to (read wasted lives!)

Just look around you- among your friends, colleagues, family members, just across to any random stranger- what seems striking is more then ever in the history of humankind, people in general are living and going about their lives as if they are going to live forever! and when the die (which they technically require to-until you have cyborgs roaming around that is!) it is often the case of misplaced priorities, lost opportunities and a lifetimes’s realization coming in just around the final turn- that what a waste it has been! Well, don’t panic and don’t jump to conclusions as yet, I am not suggesting anyway that all of us are wasted and wasting away- but this is an important anchor point of thought that one must be aware of to be absolutely sure that this is not how you want the last 10 minutes of your existence to be! So what is that we need to do about it and is there anything that we can really do about it!

People go around their lives impacting every other person that they engage with- these engagements and interactions are either sustained (in case of families and friends who cannot escape you) or are those fleeting flashes of encounters which either make to break things for the interacting individuals and at times build psyche that subsequently goes on to impact and alter subsequent engagements and interactions- long term and short term both! The challenge here is to ensure that quality of these engagements and interactions is really high and something that creates a new or a refreshing way of dealing and engaging. Think about this for a few minutes before you race ahead- How wonderful it would be if you are able to spread warmth every day and radiance like the warm winter sun and just brush that off to others around you to encourage them to the same- well sounds poetic and utopian- well it is indeed and this is also one of the reasons why our lives don’t end up being water color portraits is the contexts around us and how we decide to manage and navigate around them. While doing so however what happens is that we tend to become mediocre and start believing more about the context around us rather then reposing that faith into ourselves to prevail and overcome the contextual settings around us!

The net result of having more faith and belief in our contextual settings (read society and everything that is external to you) is that you end up using valuable time pursuing aspects and things that in the end will really not matter and no one will even remember of them having occurred in the next 100 years once the plug is pulled off your physical existence! Somewhere going about this- one experiences flashes of realization like- “This must be stopped”, “This is not what I want to do”, “What am I doing with my life”, but unless there is a sincere and focused effort to take a pause, reflect and seek what really life means for you and how you propose to ensure your idea on one aspect that you have experience can be altered in a way that you remain long after your physical experience is ceased- is the essence of the never ending quest for immortality!

As long as people continue to do things to manage and alter their immediate contextual environments with a myopic vision, they will eventually land up in the dreaded space of realizing towards the end- What a waste it has been!

A possible approach is to lead a mindful way of life- being mindful is all about being aware of what is going on in the moment and within the context of the time in the moment! It has to do a lot with dealing with everything and everyone around you within a set context of time without switching ahead into the future or slipping back into the past and trying to develop weighted perceptions based on the events already occurred or anticipating they may develop. Well this seems all easier said then done- but then nothing worthwhile in our lives has ever come easily – even to evolve to the biochemical machine that we are today- nature has taken millions of years!

There is a reason why we do not see more examples from our times- which we can confidently say will continue to impact and alter the way societies will function three hundreds years from now! Go back to history and stick around the 16th, 17th and earlier part of the 18th century- many of the things that were created, invented then have been the foundation which has enabled us live the lives that we live today- that is the point here! A closer look into the minds and lives of the people who made these things possible has a common thread (no matter which field they belonged to and what contribution they did) of being able to offer something that will stand the test of time and is built on simplicity and effectiveness and with an utilitarian value that reaches out to all sections of the society! This way and this approach is the essence of realizing immortality in a real sense. Immortality through ideas and solutions that go on to serve human kind for centuries after you physically cease to exist!

Pick up that coffee cup and spend some time today and give it a thought- “What is that you are doing with your life and what is that you want to be remembered for ever after – once you are physically taken away by time!

Do keep writing in with your suggestions/requests on what other topics/articles that you would like to share your time on. For coaching, talks, seminars and training programs offered by me towards empowerment and for customized solutions reach me at parimal.aluri@simplifylives.com.

The mystical “frame of context”

Well, as my title suggests, if you were wondering why my new blogs have not been coming in for the last few days, it’s time to start wondering and seeking the answers using this much abused technique of “frame of context”!

Well, friends no matter which nation you belong to and which town or mega city that you come from and how comfortable or uncomfortable you are in the moment, we all have been entrapped at some or other point in time either failing to use or using it with great perfection- “the concept of framing the context” It looks like a trivial aspect of our lives but don’t be fooled it is as important as anything else for your ability to build meaningful contexts around what you obeserve and see goes a long way to alter your psyche and the resulting behavior that comes around either pleasing or screwing up everyone and everything around you!

In an era where we have a chronic ailment of diminishing attention spans and focus, it is just obvious that in many cases, people end up simply missing “the context” altogether – in some cases with dire consequences.

How does this manifest- well if you have ever been part of those dreaded weekly update meetings (whether they are on a Monday, Tuesday or a Friday, really doesn’t matter!) which often end up with more issues and agony discussed rather coming up with solutions and answers- people end up leaving those social gatherings with more confusion and more new questions instead of finding answers to the already existing challenges- this often happens when context goes incognito! I am certainly not suggesting all meetings end up this way- but if you were to compute the number of meetings that happen around the world across offices and across levels and if you wanted to assume that all these are meeting their objectives of the meetings- well then our world would be a different place by the time I finish writing this article! So now you may want to ask me to stop whining and suggest a meaningful way around this- well that what we do from here!- since the context is set!

Like I mentioned in my previous blogs- in a way the context of our times is hyper-dynamic– for everyone that we deal with and everything that we do! You walk into the office- all geared up in the morning and the junior colleague (who was your best pal until last evening) has suddenly become your worst nightmare- courtesy a major goof up at work which has got your client and two levels above you fired up and going for your jugular- So now what just happened- in a matter of minutes- contexts are fleeting – one aberration (possibly beyond control) has got everyone into a vicious circle and zone of calibrating their engagements with each other for an act which has already occurred and importantly which may or may not happen in the future with similar severity! It is in times like these- the need arises to rush in and “frame the context” and let everyone know what it was and because of which – whatever shit happened – did happen! You may call this as retrospective problem fixing or morgue analysis (as the incident has already occurred with no way to salvage the incident- the impact may or may not be alterable!) but the necessity is very much real and much required to mitigate further damage (which would be completely unwarranted!)

This singular act of being able to decipher about what led to what has happened and what must be done to ensure that a similar environment is not created or offered (because of which the probability of this event getting triggered again may increase) is the essence of framing the context to events and people at workplace to have a truly sensible and meaningful scenario of team dynamics- certainly other variable factors will kick-in depending on what the organisation does, type of skill sets and personalities working at a given place- but as I said the whole approach is through offering solutions by framing the context well!

On the other levels of engaging with people out of work engagements- the personal sphere- often people miss out the “context of the statements or acts said and done” which – if you are an alive and kicking human- would have experienced aplenty- both to your advantage and disadvantage with equal measure! The only way to correct this is to give time and when it comes to building strong engagements with people- it is all about staying with them in the context that they wish you to remain and ensuring that the contextual frame is around that engagement- a slip through a word or deed which nudges you towards the edges of the contextual frame is just enough to have you ejected completely from the consideration set of the other person (don’t forget we live in times where choices are many and no one really cares or has time to do an evaluation based on meritocracy and none of your laurels will come in handy!) So the way forward…

Well keep a few simple tricks up your sleeve as you navigate the minefield of life and you go on with people and work engagements! Firstly engage only as much as you need to- limit this and you will save yourself from all the unnecessary melodrama and headache- the fewer the people and things that you manage -lesser are the frames that you need to juggle around with for managing and monitoring the dynamic contexts all the time with your fragile frame!

Next, be honest- about yourself to begin with and what you do and be a giver and stay away from the taker mindset! Ensure your frames do not end up becoming windows of your greed and slyness to meet and reach personal objectives and gratifications- this will just burn you out eventually sooner or later and leave you completely messed up- intellectually and otherwise with s sense of stagnation which will not be a very happy place to be in!

Finally always ensure that you have a grip through a strong and refined moment to moment awareness about what you deal with– whether people or work- ensure requisite ownership is displayed and is visible– remember- the trick is to ensure that your frame is also acceptable to the people involved with the context or to the activities and the people who all are going to be affected by the event!

A right frame to the context of your life- people and events around you- in a dynamic manner which is managed and monitored well- with reasonable acceptance from all those involved will help keep away a lot of meaningless conversations, conflicts and spooky thoughts that originate from failing frames and fallen contexts!

Spend some quality time with yourself and as you do so; think about your frames of context that you hold for everything that you and everyone around you! What is that you are staring at? What is coming back tom you- ease and happiness or discomfort and anxiety?

I leave you with these thoughts for now and promise you will be back soon with another interesting piece as we race ahead towards the festive season! Stay blessed and stay wise and hold your frames high and right!